Tuesday, November 29, 2011

A tough subject


[I debated publishing this as my thinking is still evolving. That said, I’d very much welcome feedback from readers who, I know, have much to teach me.]

I do not actively practice a religion – not a boast, but a place where I happen to be. I was raised Catholic and have very good memories of that time of my life and still find solace in aspects of that faith that remain as part of my fabric. I’ve also come to admire many teachings from alternate Christian sects as well as (to the extent I understand) elements of Judaism, Islam, and Hinduism. Heck, I even have learned admirable lessons from secular humanists, Deists, pantheists, and others with a spiritual centering that may discomfort many.

Among the noticeable currents in many religions is the need to atone for wrongdoings or, at the very least, live along a righteous path. Call it Lent, Ramadan, Yom Kippur, or Manusmriti – as I understand each of these, they are proscriptive calls to set ourselves on a proper course of living toward an eventual higher existence. Please forgive my simplistic description, but these all strike me as excellent calls to self-examination and to seek forgiveness or accept guidance toward better living.

OK, here comes the odd juxtaposition – your indulgence is appreciated.

As a nation, we’ve just celebrated Thanksgiving – our national day of thanks – and I got to witness some magnificently articulate statements of gratitude from friends, Facebookers, and local and national figures. I believe that among the times people are at their best are when they demonstrate sincere appreciation for the good things and the good people in their lives.

So, we are encouraged to atone and to give thanks. No complaints here.

But, how are we admonished to actively forgive others and to graciously acknowledge those offering their gratitude?

One small means is that great line in The Lord’s Prayer: “. . . and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.”   Kind of puts our own redemption on hold until we are forgiving of others, doesn’t it?

Building on this, I believe that an individual’s moral and emotional health is at least in part dependent on our ability to forgive – and by doing so, to release the chains of resentment that distract us from living our lives. Carrying hurt is a heavy burden and to forgive is a start to living more freely and happily.

I know this is easier said than done in so many cases. Recent headlines more than scream the atrocities that happen in our world that call for rightful condemnation and swift justice. We should, with terrible fervor, condemn certain actions. Even as uninvolved spectators to so many headline-grabbing misdeeds, I hope our blood still boils at the thought of these transgressions. I also acknowledge the ire we feel when those we love have been hurt.

I’m thinking far more personally: when it happens to us. Are there things that happen to us that are unforgivable? I don’t know – I’ve not experienced anything like that. I have experienced the bondage of resentment and felt its emotional upheaval more than once in my life and it wasn’t until I forgave that healing came (and also more than once – lessons about my own misbehavior emerged).

Let me be very clear: it is with respect that I acknowledge that so many are victims of truly heinous things that even the consideration of forgiving perpetrators would make one nauseous. I don’t know an answer and offer no disrespect to victims by this discussion.

There are many times where we can forgive and, by doing so, discover where we can grow in our efforts toward redemption and happiness. I stop short of calling for a national day of forgiveness – in so many cases it is a very personal and difficult thing. I do suggest that when we are seeking spiritual growth through personal atonement, we at least also ask where we need to forgive.


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1 comment:

Please be nice, sit up straight, don't mumble, be kind to animals and your family.