Alice and Mushrooms

“This time Alice waited patiently until it chose to speak again. In a minute or two the Caterpillar took the hookah out of its mouth and yawned once or twice, and shook itself. Then it got down off the mushroom, and crawled away in the grass, merely remarking as it went, 'One side will make you grow taller, and the other side will make you grow shorter.'” 1

During a recent trip north, a friend and I ended up tromping through the woods in pursuit of wild mushrooms. No, not morels – those are sought in the spring – but Chanterelles – bright orange fungi that resemble anemones one would find while diving a reef. We trudged up and down a rolling

Chanterelles in the wild

forested landscape and managed to collect close to three pounds of these delicious treats.

Records indicate that Chanterelles have been collected and eaten as long ago as the 1500s – not surprising because their apricot aroma and peppery taste makes them a delightful addition to nearly any dish. If you go collecting, be aware that imposters are prevalent in the same habitat.

That things are not always as they seem, reminds me of my recent reread of Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll (and who doesn’t love the hookah smoking caterpillar perched on the magic mushroom?). I can confidently report: it’s a weird read. The prose is messy, challenging, and nonsensical. It is also, however, a delight. Who can’t smile when such word play is proffered?

'And how many hours a day did you do lessons?' said Alice, in a hurry to change the subject.

'Ten hours the first day,' said the Mock Turtle: 'nine the next, and so on.'

'What a curious plan!' exclaimed Alice.

'That's the reason they're called lessons,' the Gryphon remarked: 'because they lessen from day to day.' 2

This tale of Alice, the Mad Hatter, the White Rabbit, Bill the Lizard, the Queen, and others was actually banned at one time in U.S. school systems because of perceived sexual references and in China because animals spoke and were portrayed at the same level of humans. In other words, Lewis’ speech wasn’t deemed “correct.”

I believe we face some real challenges to free speech and true intellectual debate because of the tightening noose of political correctness. I might be particularly sensitive to the phenomenon since I work on a university campus that once had a speech code – violation of which could result in discipline up to and including expulsion or termination.

Now, I don’t advocate being hateful or inconsiderate. I do, however, believe that one should be able to speak freely whether or not one’s words are popular. I’d never support the marching Nazis, but I’d support their right to march. Their stance on most things, to me, is abhorrent and offensive – guess what, I have no Constitutional protections against being offended. I do, however, have Constitutional protections for my speech.

I acknowledge that freedom of speech hasn’t always been played on a level field – many groups and individuals have been suppressed in our great nation’s history. That wasn’t right. Similarly, it isn’t right to suppress any individuals or groups today.

But, back to the caterpillar; enjoy Grace Slick’s performance at Woodstock some 44 years ago:

1. Carroll, Lewis. BANNED! An Anthology of Banned Books (14 books) [Illustrated] (Kindle Locations 43093-43096). Kindle Edition. 

2. Carroll, Lewis (2009-10-21). BANNED! An Anthology of Banned Books (14 books) [Illustrated] (Kindle Locations 43768-43773). Kindle Edition.

Coney Dogs and Wieners

Today, I treated myself to two Coney Dogs, fries, and a root beer for lunch. The Coney is a Michigan frank completely smothered with beef chili, chopped raw white onion, and yellow mustard. In some circles, grated Cheddar cheese is sprinkled liberally atop the concoctions – but, not today.

I dined at the Uptown Coney Island on Jackson Road just west of Ann Arbor proper. Renee, my server, was tall, attractive, blond and had an impatient energy to quickly take my order, deliver my meal and turn the table – much to the approval of Gus – the owner – who sat just across the short booth divider from my two-top table trading stories in Greek with another local restaurateur.

The last Coney’s I enjoyed were in downtown Detroit on a Sunday about a month ago. Federal jury duty loomed and I wasn’t exactly sure where the courthouse was located nor did I know parking options. The prospect of having to make a 60 mile near blind drive into the Motor City that coming Monday was daunting, so I made a test run.

To my happy surprise, the courthouse was just a half block away from two Detroit landmarks: American Coney Island and Lafayette Coney Island nestled side by side. After formulating my parking plan and locating the juror’s entrance (#OCD), I decided to catch an early lunch at one of the two – but which?

Not that tough of a decision, I decided to try a dog from each.

The older of the two, American Coney Island, was opened by Bill and Gust Keros in 1919 and was an anchor of the “grab and go” lunch for many years in a growing, vibrant early industrial city. Apparently, there was a falling out between the brothers and in 1936, Bill opened Lafayette Coney right next door and a fierce rivalry was born. Perhaps even an entire food genre was created – today, it is estimated that there are around 500 Coney diners in and around Detroit.

For additional history and information on how Detroit became the Coney Island capital, I refer you to a great website that has additional resources about the dog’s origins:  http://www.theatlanticcities.com/

The clear winner that day was Lafayette: the casing on the frank met my bite with a great snap, the onions had the right tang and the chili had a wonderful peppery tease. I found American Coney Island chili just a bit too sweet and the casing lacked the snap.

Speaking of winners, losers and Wieners, what about that mayor’s race in New York City? I’m aghast that Anthony Wiener is insistent on staying in the race after (what one would hope would be) public humiliation for electronic infidelities and a subsequent resignation from the U.S. House of Representatives, a public mea culpa hand-in-hand with his cuckolded wife where he proclaimed his full repentance and transformation, and now new revelations that his peccadillos never ceased.

The New York Times, one of his previously largest supporters, has excoriated Wiener and advocated that he drop out of the race – as have other political and media lions. His poll numbers are plummeting.

I don’t understand it. Does he believe that he can do anything he wants without consequence? Does he think Big Apple voters don’t care about lies and broken vows?

Of course, some years ago, Mayor Marion Berry was reelected in Washington, DC after being arrested and convicted on a drug charge. Maybe partisanship really can trump good sense.

Even though for an hour or so after eating Coney Dogs the taste will revisit through unrepentant hiccups, that is a far more welcome sensation than the bad taste that lingers from egotistic, amoral, politicos.

Coney Dog image from: Coney Dog Picture

Detroit is bankrupt and I don't feel so good myself

With apologies to Lewis Grizzard, the late great story teller from Georgia (see http://www.lewisgrizzard.com/), Detroit is bankrupt and I don’t feel so good myself.

The news cycle from the last few weeks has presented the thinking public with several opportunities for self-examination – especially of our core values. A fellow named Snowden is holed up at the Moscow airport looking for a home; the Internal Revenue Service has been proven to target organizations on the basis of their political leanings; the President announced that he would delay the enforcement of provisions of his tenure’s signature legislation; a jury found George Zimmerman not guilty yet a young man died at his hand; Detroit has filed for bankruptcy.

Oh, and I had a tooth explode while on a business trip to Chicago.

Edward Snowden, a contractor with high level security clearance stole secrets from the National Security Agency (NSA), left the country, and shared said secrets with Britain’s Guardian Newspaper. The information disclosed a far-reaching capability (and practice!) of data farming of individual communications both foreign and domestic. Here’s the issue: Snowden’s actions are both arguably treasonous and arguably heroic. He’s disclosed state secrets that reportedly have helped foil terror plots within our borders and he’s blown the whistle on practices that seem to run afoul of several key provisions of our Bill of Rights. I guess I’d be more comfortable with the hero argument if he hadn’t run.

With every stop of the “Wolverine” – Amtrak’s train service between Pontiac, Michigan and Chicago, Illinois – the pain intensified in my left jaw. By my arrival in the Windy City, even my left eye hurt. A call to my dentist (and friend) Scott left me admonished to find a local dentist to evaluate my situation.

The IRS is subject to many digs, jokes, and faux-horror stories. It appears, however, that our natural dismay may have more footing than we knew. Groups applying for particular tax status were delayed or denied because they were perceived by IRS personnel as having a political agenda contrary to that of the administration. Full blown investigations are underway and some allegations point to instances where groups of different political stripes were also subject to similar disservice. I have more than a casual discomfort that very powerful government agencies seem to operate in utter defiance of the First Amendment.

Fortunately, I walked past a small plaque that said “Setty Dental Practice” on my approach to my hotel. The plaque wasn’t more than 3” x 9” but I found it early Friday morning as I sought a local practitioner. I was in their waiting room at 7:45 am and was heartened to see the diplomas from the University of Michigan Dental School – a good omen. I was scheduled for an evaluation at 11:40 am.

The mandate to businesses that they must have (and prove) health insurance for their full time employees will not be enforced starting in 2014. This was a clearly stated provision of the law and the administration has chosen not to enforce the law. I don’t get it. I seem to recall a specific grievance about King George in the Declaration of Independence: “He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.” If a piece of legislation is passed and signed into law, shouldn’t it be enforced? Are we subjects to a king who can overrule the people’s legislature?

My Chicago dental exam pointed toward two possible courses of action: an immediate root canal or a course of antibiotics and pain relievers that would carry me through the weekend until I could see my own dentist. I chose the latter.

The Zimmerman case, to me, underscores a few things. Laws are imperfect. It is, however, important to respect these laws – even if imperfect. And legal does not necessarily mean moral. Almost exactly a year ago today, I awoke to a criminal attempting to crawl into my bedroom window. It would have been perfectly legal to lay and wait until said bad guy got into my home and then shoot him. It would not have been moral. Instead, I yelled, told him (assuming a "him") that I’d kill him if he came in and racked the shotgun. He didn’t enter. An important take away: we might not like a law and dislike a court outcome. But is it worse to be in a society where the application of laws is malleable based on situational public opinion, a judge’s whim, or the braying of political pundits? I think it would be.

Scott amended his calendar to get me into his office first thing on Tuesday morning – at least an hour’s worth of drilling and evaluation. My jaw hurt. We’ve decided on an intermediate course of action in hopes of avoiding a root canal or an extraction. The medications remain important.

Detroit, Michigan is the largest American city to file for bankruptcy. The Chapter 9 filing was submitted today – consistent with the emergency manager’s exhortation to creditors. Real attempts were made to negotiate settlements outside of bankruptcy and certain groups wouldn’t budge. Now, it will be interesting to see the painful outcomes of bankruptcy court.

Perhaps these creditors will find that the intermediate course of action would have saved much pain. I’m relatively certain that my pain meds won’t help.

Image from:  http://www.silverliving.com/blog/2013/05/will-ltc-bankrupt-the-nation/